I was blown away multiple times while reading this to recognize parts from your story that could be copied-and-pasted verbatim into mine. I relate SO MUCH to the early decades of shame/hiding. Also this relationship with the body that feels like battle or war — my body has betrayed me! And the only way I know how to live inside of it is to wrestle with it, ignore it, or abuse it. And I also fell into this unconscious belief that acceptance meant no grief or acknowledgment of loss. Oof. I just relate to so much of this. Which is probably why I paused so hard on this paragraph: “What excites me the most about where I’m at now is not transcending my body, fixing it or making peace with it in some final permanent way, but developing a relationship with it that allows me to live in it without shame or desperation being the organizing principles.” Yes. Yes, yes. I feel like I’m in the earliest stages of this kind of softening. It does not come easily to me. Thank you for putting this all into words💛
Thank you, Rebekah! I’m so glad it resonated so much. The softening does not come easy to me either. It has been like learning a new language, and not a romance language!
Thus is so beautiful, wise and awe amazing. Privileged to walk beside you my love. Your devotion to evolving , growing and learning is incredible and your work on metabolizing so much of the shame, loss and fear this illness has brought is awe inspiring! You are amazing and sharing your wisdom so humbly with the world is such a gift! I celebrate you and your incredible spirit. Lucky me!
I love your writing so much. It always resonates deeply with me. I recently started a job with a grief organization and I've been seeing a lot of parallels between grief and disability (and the grief in disability). Thinking about how to live with and beside our grief/illness in a way rather that isn't simple acceptance but something more complex is something I've been thinking about a lot lately. Thanks for sharing.
Thank you so much, Sage. That means a lot. I’d love to hear more about the grief organization. I recently finished a yearlong program through Spirit Rock called Year to Live based on the book by Stephen Levine. It’s for anyone who wants to connect more deeply with their mortality. The book is great and the program was incredibly rich. Thank you for taking the time to read my writing and share. I really appreciate it.
Gracias Dave , una vez más , cuanta sabiduría acumulada , ahora en relación a tu cuerpo . Creo que el cuerpo es un gran maestro . En mi caso , he cambiado mucho con la menopausia y hoy en día trato de escuchar a mi cuerpo más que nunca. Parece que la biología hizo que luego de la reproducción no sea necesario seguir con tanta fuerza , pero me resisto a la biología y
I was blown away multiple times while reading this to recognize parts from your story that could be copied-and-pasted verbatim into mine. I relate SO MUCH to the early decades of shame/hiding. Also this relationship with the body that feels like battle or war — my body has betrayed me! And the only way I know how to live inside of it is to wrestle with it, ignore it, or abuse it. And I also fell into this unconscious belief that acceptance meant no grief or acknowledgment of loss. Oof. I just relate to so much of this. Which is probably why I paused so hard on this paragraph: “What excites me the most about where I’m at now is not transcending my body, fixing it or making peace with it in some final permanent way, but developing a relationship with it that allows me to live in it without shame or desperation being the organizing principles.” Yes. Yes, yes. I feel like I’m in the earliest stages of this kind of softening. It does not come easily to me. Thank you for putting this all into words💛
Thank you, Rebekah! I’m so glad it resonated so much. The softening does not come easy to me either. It has been like learning a new language, and not a romance language!
Thus is so beautiful, wise and awe amazing. Privileged to walk beside you my love. Your devotion to evolving , growing and learning is incredible and your work on metabolizing so much of the shame, loss and fear this illness has brought is awe inspiring! You are amazing and sharing your wisdom so humbly with the world is such a gift! I celebrate you and your incredible spirit. Lucky me!
I love your writing so much. It always resonates deeply with me. I recently started a job with a grief organization and I've been seeing a lot of parallels between grief and disability (and the grief in disability). Thinking about how to live with and beside our grief/illness in a way rather that isn't simple acceptance but something more complex is something I've been thinking about a lot lately. Thanks for sharing.
Thank you so much, Sage. That means a lot. I’d love to hear more about the grief organization. I recently finished a yearlong program through Spirit Rock called Year to Live based on the book by Stephen Levine. It’s for anyone who wants to connect more deeply with their mortality. The book is great and the program was incredibly rich. Thank you for taking the time to read my writing and share. I really appreciate it.
Ya seguimos la conversa en Austin Jajja
Gracias Dave , una vez más , cuanta sabiduría acumulada , ahora en relación a tu cuerpo . Creo que el cuerpo es un gran maestro . En mi caso , he cambiado mucho con la menopausia y hoy en día trato de escuchar a mi cuerpo más que nunca. Parece que la biología hizo que luego de la reproducción no sea necesario seguir con tanta fuerza , pero me resisto a la biología y